I Will Never Forget

I will always remember where I was this day ten years ago. The sadness that took over every part of my being. The tears that welled up. The breath that was lost from my lungs. I couldn't move. Just sitting there in amazement at the sight on the television. What was going on? Who could do this? Why us? Why anybody for that matter?!
I was 18 years old + getting ready for class that morning, just like every other day. I turned the TV on for a minute + was paralyzed. I was so confused. I have never really seen war {or understood it} in my lifetime until then. Nor had I ever known such pain and sorrow for another human like I had that day. And still, ten years later, I bawl my eyes out when I see coverage of the tragedy that took place on 9.11.01. The sights from the towers + ash covering the people + streets. News of more planes crashing! The voices of the newscasters were lost. I couldn't hear them. My mind could not focus. I felt so alone that morning. All I wanted was my family + to curl up in a ball with them.
All of the lives lost. All of the sacrifices that were made. Lives that were changed forever.
We took Baylor + Hunter to our local fire station today to bring the fire fighters lunch and to say thank you for everything that they do each and every day. It wasn't much, but we hope the gesture was enough to make them feel appreciated. I want this to become a tradition for our little family. And not just on 9.11. And not just the fire station, but the police station, EMTs, etc. We need to show our appreciation for one another and more often.
I read an article today on Yahoo about a young boy at the age of 11 who lost his father that fateful day. Ten years later, he spoke again + was still just as moving. He read a poem on the second anniversary of 9.11 that really touched me, + of course brought me to tears.

Stars by Deborah Chandra

"I like the way they looked down from the sky / And didn't seem to mind the way I cried / And didn't say, 'Now wipe away those tears,' / Or, 'Tell us, tell us what's the matter here!' / But shining through the dark they calmly stayed / And gently held me in their quiet way.  / I felt them watching over me, each one / And let me cry and cry till I was done."

Here is the link

I love this world + I love my family + I love my life. But, it's becoming harder + harder to stay in a love/love relationship with this world when so many things go wrong. I really worry for my children. Will they see this, too, in their lifetime? Will they know this sort of pain + sorrow in their own country? I can only hope not. But, I'm just one person.

I will always remember...